Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Professional Clinical Counselor Cara Morales – works with teens, couples, and families who find themselves in a difficult season of life.
Cara joined us here – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7vNp… – for her tips on taking care of mental health in general; for couples; for parents of children aged 0-5yo and parents of children aged 6-12yo.
In this extension segment – Cara specifically gives tips to parents with children going through adolescent stage. She opens by saying that this is her most favorite group to deal with. And gives her tips on how parents can help their adolescent children take care of their #mentalhealth
She says this group is suffering the most, in terms of being connected. And in her opinion, this is currently the loneliest age group, affected by Covid-19 restrictions and quarantine.
Here are her tips for parents of #adolescents –
1. Be aware of brain development and help them manage the tsunami of emotions – She mentions Dr. Dan Seigle’s research findings about the scientific explanation behind the the physical changes in the brain of someone going through adolescence. It is a physical, albeit internal shift which causes the changes in behavior of the child. This is the reason why adolescents feel a wave of intense emotions, sometimes out of nowhere, or with very little provocation – that escalates very quickly; and also goes down quickly.
She adds that it is also different between how boys respond versus girls’ response. Girls get affected more than boys, and seem more “emotional”. She tells parents to expect it and help them go through it. Emotions are a natural part of the human experience. Parents should not stifle emotions; but rather help their children channel and/or cope. And because of this, Cara shares her second tip –
2. Teach them coping skills – She says physical activity is a very helpful coping tool. Since the changes are physical, as well. She recommends exercise, to get bodies moving and expending energy.
3. Help them connect with their peers – According to Cara, this is another way and an important way to cope because teens/adolescents need their peers as this is also the stage of identity formation.
And this is the most difficult at this time because of shelter-in-place orders. She says parents can encourage their adolescent children’s participation in Zoom parties, even for just moments – to laugh, share a joke – in order to feel connected.
But Cara also warns parents to determine and differentiate good screen time vs bad screen time.
Social media is proving to be an important connection tool; but can also be very dangerous as it is being exploited by bad elements in the society. However, where parents and concerned, being involved in their adolescent kids’ social media activity and consumption, is not an issue of privacy but an issue of safety. Too much privacy and autonomy for teenagers may be dangerous.
Cara explains that though they may seem to resent it and resist it, adolescents need lots of adults in their lives. And parents should know the value that they play in their children’s life. They need to keep building the relationship and be there for them. And when they do this, whether their adolescent children admit it or not, they actually appreciate that their parents are asking questions. It means they see them and they care to understand.
In closing, Cara defines the adolescent stage as starting from 12 years old, until 25 years old. Scientifically, this is the stage of brain reconstruction and development and is critical in how adolescent move into adulthood, with purpose and direction. As a parting shot, Cara reminds parents – Your work can replace you; but your children cannot. Be there for them.
To continue this discussion, Cara is at:
Website: www.caramoralescounseling.com
Email: [email protected]
As the world continues to shelter-in-place – we continue to gather and share accurate news, relevant information and helpful tools to enable our viewers and followers to manage during this time of global pandemic.